Confessions
by Cindre
Summary: Sam tells Frodo the truth. Slash.


Series: Lord Of The Rings  
Title: Confessions  
Written: 17 December 2002  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Sam/Frodo  
Words: 1,108  
Warnings: PWP, Fluff.  
Disclaimer: They're not mine.  
Summary: Sam tells Frodo the truth. 

Here I am...so afraid of losing you and you're just next to me, peacefully sleeping. It seems that sleep is the only place you can escape your destiny; the burden you carry is ever-present.

You are so beautiful. The moonlight illuminates every soft curve of your body. Anyone who saw you would swear you were an elf. From your silken curls to the tips of your toes you are perfect.

I smile as I watch the slow rise and fall of your chest; the way the light is portrayed on your smooth pale skin makes the whole situation seem surreal. I try to note every detail of you, as if I could somehow etch these moments into my memory and then sometime later make them happen again.

I gather up courage and begin to stroke your hair, wondering if you know just how much you mean to me. I've intended upon telling you sooner or later...it just turned out that it should be later than sooner. I'm sure you don't feel the same about me; it would be impossible, wouldn't it? You couldn't possibly care for me like I care for you. I care too much.

Your lips part slightly and I smile and trace your cheek with my fingertips. "I love you, Mister Frodo." My daydream is broken when you stir.

I gasp, wondering if you've heard my confession in the still of the night. Your eyes flutter open slowly and look into mine.

"You...what, Sam?"

Oh no. How am I going to get out of this?

"I-I-I..didn't say anythin' Master Frodo..perhaps you should go back to-"

"You said you loved me."

Hmm...there's no escape now. I feel heat rising to my cheeks, and I begin to feel sick. There's no way he'll ever talk to me again. Boys don't like boys, and if they do they're supposedly damned. I have thought about that before, but it seemed such a small price in comparison to loving Frodo. He is my world, he is what makes the best part of me. Without him...I would die.

I have no idea what to say. The only thing on my mind right now is that Frodo knows I love him, and I want to know how he feels. Even if it may be that he feels in no way the same. I need to know. But I can't ask. I don't have the courage.

"I...was hoping you..wouldn't hear that, Mister Frodo."

"Why not?"

This catches me off guard. It's as if...no..it's impossible. Now I have to know, courage put aside.

"What do you think Mr. Frodo..? Is it not wrong for boys to be in love with boys?"

I shift, and look straight into his eyes, checking for any sign of..well..anything. All I see is seriousness. Then I continue.

"I wouldn't want anyone to know that I loved you, especially yourself! What would everyone think?"

Then what you say next almost takes the breath out of me.

"Who cares what the others think? And as for what I think...I'm in love with you too, so it doesn't matter."

Now that is not right. I pout, and I think he notices for he begins giggling. I wonder what on Earth he thinks is funny.

"Why did you not ever say anythin'?!"

"Sam, I'm sorry. I thought you knew all along! You honestly can't say that you haven't noticed I've slept beside you since we started this journey, and I've flirted with you every time we were alone?"

Flirted with me? Is that what that was? It only seemed like kindness to me, but I suppose that if I thought that there was no way that he would think the same about me as I did about him...that I would think that he wouldn't flirt with me. Realization creeps into my mind.

"You..you love me too?"

"Sam, I have always loved you."

I feel I am on the verge of tears. I pray that I am not dreaming, for if I were I feel it would destroy me when I wake. There is only so much that I can take.

"Mr. Frodo..please pinch me."

He tilts his head in the cutest way, baring some of his neck, just asking for me to ravish it. I immediately blush when I realize what I'm thinking.

"Why, Sam?"

"Sir, I feel like I am dreaming."

He laughs. The cutest laugh I have ever heard. I look around to make sure the others aren't woken from it. I raise my gaze to Frodo when he touches my arm lightly.

"Sam...now that everything is in the open, I want to ask you something."

"Yes, sir?"

"Sam..when everything is over with..I mean with the journey and all, and when we go home to the Shire.."

He pauses, obviously he has been thinking about this for a long time.

"I want you to move in with me."

"But..Frodo, what will mother and father think? What will I tell them?"

"Does it matter? Sam I want..I need to be with you."

Now I really feel like crying. He's not so subtle as before..he really feels this way. I pull him into a hug and hold him there, hoping the others will not wake anytime soon, for I feel that I could stay like this forever.

"Sam..we should get some rest. We still have a long journey to face."

"Yes, Master Frodo."

But I refuse to let him go. I grin, then lay down with him still in my arms, wondering how he will take to cuddling. He seems to like it, and in fact squirms a bit until he's as close to me as possible, then grabs a fistful of my vest as if to make sure that I didn't leave him. I smile, and stroke his hair and he smiles back and closes his eyes, resting his head against my chest. This is wonderful..in this world, nothing exists except for me and him. Not the ring, not the others, not this horrible, painstaking task, nothing but me and him. Perfect.

I decide just to watch him sleep against me. Though, if we have both just confessed, would it be so wrong to kiss those perfect pink lips? I smile, and slowly lower my lips to his. After I retreat I wonder how I could obtain such a perfect creature..a perfect mate. It doesn't matter now. I have him, he is mine. This makes me ultimately happy.

Now all that is left is to finish this grueling journey. I sigh, stroke his cheek one last time, then rest my chin on top of his head and wait for day to break.


End file.
